So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
