what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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