You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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