it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
my poor anus
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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