His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
