Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
