I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
