Jerry, you need to find god
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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