love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Randomize
