Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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