The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
