I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
