Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
