if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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