Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
