I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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