Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
