ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
