there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
its liver damage thursday
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
