I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
