16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
