she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize