If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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