its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
