Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize
