Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
