just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
