I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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