As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
