How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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