I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
