It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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