This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
