Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
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