Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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