a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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