My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
