..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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