Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
