I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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