Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
people are starting to question the shark bite story
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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