We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
She's the barista slut.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize