How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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