Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
