apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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