so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize