This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
