i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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