I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
