So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
